The Dance Primer

Today we continue with Emily Potter’s story. She is pictured below dancing with Travis, her Missoula Cowboy.

“Are you going to ask someone to dance?” my friend asked me. No, I’m not. I don’t do that. If a man doesn’t ask me to dance, I go home dance-less. There are feminists who will roll their eyes at me. Yes, one reason is that I simply delight in old fashioned chivalry. But I promise I’m not being medievally stubborn.

I’ve danced long enough to know that a dancing man understands he has the 3 to 1 advantage any time he walks onto a dance floor. At least three women at all times would like to jump into his manly-man arms. Let’s just begin with the fact that he’s there at all. We can infer by his presence at the Mambo or the Carumba night club on a Friday night that he is already smart enough to know that the secret to getting most women to go gaa gaa over him is that he dances. Travis confessed to me that’s why he started dancing at all. He got a clue when he saw men dripping with women begging them to dance. While there’s nothing wrong with asking a man to dance, I’ve watched these “amazing dancer” men’s eyes as it happens. Their eyes say, “Ok, I guess I can do you a favor.” The woman is thrilled to shed her wallflower roots, and the man gives her an obligatory turn.

On the other hand, when a man reaches out his hand to ask me to dance, he is in charge. It was his choice to ask me, and whether I’m a good or bad partner doesn’t matter any more. It’s a partnership where he leads, and I follow. As much as the man had a 3 in 1 advantage before he reached out his hand to me, his unfair advantage has suddenly dissipated into thin air. He has chosen, and I have accepted. Neither is doing the other one a favor. We are now on equal ground.

Don’t miss the story’s finale…

Did you read the first part of Emily’s story?